teh_pwnerer pwned my laptop

Yesterday, something happened to our little pesky stinkin’ country it needed for a long, long time. We were honoured to be able to finally meet Jeremy a.k.a. teh_pwnerer himself. He chose our country to visit. tnx m8 gg roflol

As a real PurePwnage fanboy (since, like, ep2) I just had to be there. A friend of mine said I had to check PurePwnage.com. I couldn’t believe it. I was actually in the position to meet teh_pwnerer. He would be at a certain bar in Amsterdam at a certain time. After some discussion we came to the conclusion we just couldn’t let this chance go and we went off to Amsterdam the next day. We didn’t want to screw up as we did in our previous trip to the screening in Rijswijk, so we had prepared our planning thouroughly.

We arrived at Amsterdam Centraal right on time. There wasn’t any trouble to find that pub Jeremy would supposably be located. We weren’t the first to arrive though. A bunch of WoW gamers already positioned themselves inside the pub. I don’t like the game. And I really don’t like the addicts that come with mmorpg’s. Don’t get me wrong, I do not dislike the people but sometimes their behaviour is a bit, well, anti social. Just like this time. I guess the pub owner didn’t want those guys in because they simply sat there talking about rogue this, tank that without buying themselves a drink. The group was getting bigger and bigger. The group was even bigger than the group at the screening.

Where do you go with a group too large to fit in a pub? Right, “de dam”. So our little army of gamers and geeks moved towards the most known concrete pole in the world for the meet-and-greet event. Most of the people have made photographs with Jeremy and Kyle and almost everybody got something signed. Some guys even brought SNES controllers or their gamecube. I couldn’t find anything I pwn with to sign. But I was lucky. By accident I didn’t manage to go home first after school to drop off my laptop. My laptop has seen may hours of Counter-Strike 1.5 (yes, 5) and Q3A. So why hesitate? I met teh_pwnerer and he pwned my laptop with, luckaly, a permanent marker. My laptop has risen in value with almost 200% and now I can pwn even more n00bs with it now it’s marked with teh_pwnerer’s autograph. This is the best laptop casemod you can possibly think of.

Finally we all went to the Rembrandtplein, well, I guess it’s called like that, and had a beer. Except those uber geeks of course. I only could drink one beer because I had to leave really soon. Too bad Doug couldn’t come. Because us fps players were a minority. I guess most of us were just too buzy pwning n00bs. Most of the conversations were about powers you could earn at certain levels and how much they pwn and stuff. Actually, point ‘n click isn’t about pwning. But we know that by now. I bet even PODbot in Jasonmode can beat those guys at CS, hell, even hpb_bot. But all the nice stories come to an end some time. So does this. We had to leave. After saying Jeremy and Kyle goodbye we went back to the real capital of the Netherlands, Eindhoven.

Skrie told us we don’t need a credit card for paypal. I didn’t know. They can expect some new orders at the n00b store very soon.

New Developments at the Front?

Time again for my new monthly dump.

I’m busy right now and don’t have to tell you that much really. Sorry guys.

Geek Blood

After reading this article I can’t keep it to myself much longer. Yes, we are violent. Console hooligans, script kiddie bashers, rl-hackers, keyboard swordsmen. We have many names these days. To make some things a bit more understandable for the outsiders, compared to us the British football league hooligans are small useless wussies. Geeks are not like other geeks. We seem to be the friendly bunch without any visciousness within our nerdy hearts. This is all but the truth I tell you.

It all began back in the days. We refer to this period as the stone age. People were using DOS on i386’s and playing nethack. Some people stood up from the crowd and developed to the beings you now know as the geek. Since then the world has been changed. Not all geeks agreed with other geeks. In the beginning they could solve their disputes with dialog in stead of violence.

Now, things are different. There is a huge number of different geek groups, each with their own opinion and style. Just like back in the stone age some groups do not agree. At first some major battles were fought on usenet. We have lost some of our best comrades in the epic usenet wars of the second era. But these wars were fought using words, and words alone. The first attack on a server, and on the same time the beginning of the third era, was done by a fanatic group of geeks formed around a spinoff of the Berkerly operating system, OpenBSD. This attack on one of Undernet’s IRC servers was fast and ruthless. Shortly after a brave group of Red Hat gurus launched a counter attack on some of OpenBSD’s backbone servers. By accident they attacked a server running NT and serving a Microsoft support forum. It died a quick death. These geeks responded by launching random attacks against any non-Microsoft operating system community. Reliable sources tell us they may have been supported by no other than Bill Gates himself.

I got involved after an attempt to break some of our Debian repository servers. I’ve been part of some succesful raids against the Gentoo and Fedora user groups. Luckaly we got backup from our friends over at Ubuntu to teach those Red Hat geeks a lesson.

A few weeks ago I’ve received a message, heavily encrypted, telling me some of the user groups got involved in fist fights at FOSDEM. I really hate myself now, I’ve missed the event this year. After this incident more and more geeks have been seen at arms dealers and other criminal scum. I’m not that hard core but I know something’s about to happen. I’ve ordered my AK on eBay yesterday, just to be sure. I think some of us will have to pay with our lives to defend our user group. We still haven’t finished the lobby war against Microsoft at the European Council. I think when we successfully banish Microsoft from Europe, the war will be unleashed and only one group will remain. It will be bloody, but worth it.

To all my comrades out there: good luck, may the source be with you. Don’t forget to buy some armour at JINX. The fourth era will be ours! AYBABTU!